Hello Friends,
This month I am again sharing a personal story and communication with my dog Dory about the ending of a relationship, how she sees the situation and who she would like to live with. It was a tough one for me but as always, animals bring healing to exactly the places we need it most.
It’s not personal.
My best friend for decades and partner for the last 12 years, Kip, used to say this to me all the time when I would come home from my biotech job and call him in tears, almost every day.
“It’s just business, Christine, that’s just how some businesses work and it’s not personal,” he would chide. But to me it was. I was a person and it was about me.
It. Was. Personal.
April 2012
“We are letting you go as of today,” the meek HR woman had said all those years ago. My boss sat quietly beside her, not looking at me.
“Why?” I asked.
“You don’t really want to know that do you?” she said almost fearfully.
I felt sick and thought I might pass out. I just stared back at her. Earlier in the week I had reached a breaking point and confronted my boss, asking point blank why he always ignored me when asking each scientist for ideas at our team meetings. “I feel bitch slapped when you pass over me again and again,” I had said.
That must be why.
Bitch-slapped. Kip told me later that I shouldn’t have used that word.
"It's so unfair how you were treated. Unfortunately, women can’t get away with the kind of talk men can," he soothed.
“No shit sherlock,” was my angry reply.
It was definitely personal. I was wrecked. Kip closed down his boat shop on Cape Cod and moved in to help me survive what proved to be hands down, the hardest two years of my life. Kip helped me, and my sled dogs did as well; the most important of them being Dory.
Dory was born by c-section, just five months before that self-worth smashing event, and the moment she was placed in my arms, I knew we were important to each other. She grew into a troublesome yearling, causing me to focus more on her wily ways than my difficult circumstances and then as I grew more confident, so did she. Or, was it the other way around?, Yes, I think that is more true because Dory matured into the most trustworthy companion and lead sled dog I have ever known.
She has led 250 mile races, 120 mile and winning 30 mile races.She has confidently navigated deep snow, long distances, biting cold and has even run the whole show as I barely clung on to the sled when I had cancer. She made living possible again and, as good sled dogs do, kept me focused forward in life instead of stagnantly staring at the trail behind, wishing things were different. What it Takes to Survive
And in return, the only thing she ever asked of me was to be treated a bit differently. She wanted to be a partner and so that is what she has become.
She rides in the cab of the truck, instead of a dog box, lives in the house instead of the kennel and rarely, very rarely needs a leash. She is respected and loved by all people and dogs in our family even though she has never shown aggressive dominance toward any.
Dory simply Is.
Dory has not, however, only been important to me. She has also stood beside and cared for Kip. When she retired from the dog team in 2020, she transitioned slowly from my side to his. Now Dory sleeps on his bed and demands to ride in the truck with him when he goes anywhere; the store, the dump (where there are cookies!) and evening rides to listen to the red sox in peace.
In peace. You caught that did you? Well done.
Yes, Kip and I have found ourselves in a stagnant place. We are both can-do people and when there is a challenge to undertake, we put our heads down and get it done. People in need? We are there. “It’s just what we do,” Kip always said. But while we are excellent caretakers of others, we have not cared for ourselves as individuals well at all, and so, we are separating and he wants Dory to go with him.
“Maybe you could talk to her and see what she thinks about living with me,” he asked a few weeks ago. I put it off.
“You need to make sure you have a place for her,” I advised, as if he didn’t know this.
“I’ll trade you the patio furniture for a reading with Dory,” he said and I finally laughed out loud.
I still put it off for another week because deep down, I knew she was meant to go but when she finally told me what she thought, it was so profound that it healed something in both Kip and me. She talked about her purpose with me and with him. How she helps and teaches us in different ways and that she supports our quest to overcome stagnation in our lives.
Her time with me, helping me to heal, to regain my confidence and find huge moments of joy in the wildest of places, is done. She says I now know how to find those drops of joy on my own. Now she looks forward to slowing down with the “do”-er, helping him to enjoy the peace of nature and just being Kip.
There were tears, and hugs, and more tears and more hugs between Kip and I after the session. Just the peace of knowing what Dory had to say has changed the dynamic of our separation in a huge way.
We are both so grateful to Dory and want to share this with you because life IS so personal that it is important to sometimes see outside of our bubble of perception and see that we are supported even in our hard times, even by our animals…especially by our animals🌹.
If you would like to watch the video of the session I did with Dory for Kip (and me), click the video link above. You can also find other sessions with clients on my YouTube channel HERE.
The goal of this new venture is to show as many people as possible, what unseen connections are possible with animals. Please like, subscribe and share to spread the word if it is meaningful to you. And if you have had a session with me and would like to share all, or part of it with the world, let me know and I’ll make it happen. Together we can show the world what is possible and that our connection to our pets is more than some can even imagine.
Our connections are deeply personal.
Thank you all for being a part of my world.
If you would like to explore the deeper connection you have with your animal, book a session with me and we will find out what they have to share.
